As most of the civilised world will now have heard, the Michigan Wolverines were upset by the Appalachian State Mountaineers yesterday. Michigan were ranked as the #5 school in the nation; Appalachian State, because they're in Division 1-AA, are technically ranked lower than every Division 1-A school, no matter how shit. Yes, that includes Stanford. Appalachian State blocked two kicks in one game yesterday, a statline that most teams in any league, pro or collegiate, would struggle to match in a season. Appalachian State celebrated by trekking into the mountains and successfully wiping the cougar off the face of the earth, then grilling a couple of bald eagles using the force of their game faces to light the fire. These Mountaineers are real men, they laid waste to Michigan like Attila the Hun and Genghis Khan put in a blender then poured into the mouth of Julius Caesar. Michigan cannot go unbeaten now because they stepped too close to the Mountaineers and got their faces broken and cunts punted. I cannot emphasise strongly enough how much better Appalachian State are than your favourite collegiate team.
Summary - MOUNTAINEERS. FUCK YEAH.
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